Monday, July 05, 2004
I'm sorry, Mama
So I've been cleaning out my closet. . .
Those of you in the audience who are already moaning know that this is always high times, heralding the rediscovery of the veritable essence of Truth, Beauty, and Justice themselves, if by "the veritable essence of Truth, Beauty, and Justice themselves" you mean "truckloads of dust bunnies and other assorted useless crap." However, over the course of my travels and travails, I discovered the following list, which was apparently my response to a seemingly-benign English-class assignment asking "what do you want to be when you grow up?"
Elvis impersonator, hermit, puppeteer, secretary, lawyer, forest ranger, coroner, blacksmith, lawn painter, cartoonist, engineer, playwright, page at the library, poet, haberdasher, bus driver, doctor, auto mechanic, the guy who runs the carousel, stonecarver, taxi driver, psychic, seamstress/tailor, police officer, woodcarver, hairstylist/barber, weaver, physicist, yarn maker, quilter, liontamer, bearded lady, soap-opera writer, lumberjack, photographer, jester, bartender, statistician, actuary, grocery-bagger, cook, clerk at the library, salesperson, UN translator, farmer, electrician, psychologist, explorer, optometrist, hit man, professional mourner, biographer, florist, carpenter, abstract artist, Inspector #38, dentist, ballerina, motivational speaker, social worker, DJ, librarian at the library, mascot, pro athlete, shoeshiner, plumber, perfume creator, philosopher, sommelier, dishwasher, reporter, bodyguard, chandler, cobbler, high school guidance counselor, custodian, teacher, spy, bioethicist, potter, architect, writer, musician, astronaut, bug exterminator, magician, toymaker, exotic dancer, astronomer, advertising copy writer, test pilot, astrologer, research scientist, fisherman, waiter, private detective, interior decorator, butler, glazier, calligrapher, film and stage director, train conductor, nurse, actor, clown, shepherd, ventriloquist, singer, mailman, mortician, firefighter, drug dealer, coffee taster, politician, snake handler, tour guide, museum curator, bank teller, economist, security guard, priest, hobo, theoretical mathematician, psychiatrist, assembly-line worker, moshiach, bricklayer, paramedic, repairer of appliances, jeweler, soul.
So I've been cleaning out my closet. . .
Those of you in the audience who are already moaning know that this is always high times, heralding the rediscovery of the veritable essence of Truth, Beauty, and Justice themselves, if by "the veritable essence of Truth, Beauty, and Justice themselves" you mean "truckloads of dust bunnies and other assorted useless crap." However, over the course of my travels and travails, I discovered the following list, which was apparently my response to a seemingly-benign English-class assignment asking "what do you want to be when you grow up?"
Elvis impersonator, hermit, puppeteer, secretary, lawyer, forest ranger, coroner, blacksmith, lawn painter, cartoonist, engineer, playwright, page at the library, poet, haberdasher, bus driver, doctor, auto mechanic, the guy who runs the carousel, stonecarver, taxi driver, psychic, seamstress/tailor, police officer, woodcarver, hairstylist/barber, weaver, physicist, yarn maker, quilter, liontamer, bearded lady, soap-opera writer, lumberjack, photographer, jester, bartender, statistician, actuary, grocery-bagger, cook, clerk at the library, salesperson, UN translator, farmer, electrician, psychologist, explorer, optometrist, hit man, professional mourner, biographer, florist, carpenter, abstract artist, Inspector #38, dentist, ballerina, motivational speaker, social worker, DJ, librarian at the library, mascot, pro athlete, shoeshiner, plumber, perfume creator, philosopher, sommelier, dishwasher, reporter, bodyguard, chandler, cobbler, high school guidance counselor, custodian, teacher, spy, bioethicist, potter, architect, writer, musician, astronaut, bug exterminator, magician, toymaker, exotic dancer, astronomer, advertising copy writer, test pilot, astrologer, research scientist, fisherman, waiter, private detective, interior decorator, butler, glazier, calligrapher, film and stage director, train conductor, nurse, actor, clown, shepherd, ventriloquist, singer, mailman, mortician, firefighter, drug dealer, coffee taster, politician, snake handler, tour guide, museum curator, bank teller, economist, security guard, priest, hobo, theoretical mathematician, psychiatrist, assembly-line worker, moshiach, bricklayer, paramedic, repairer of appliances, jeweler, soul.
